Eff my stroke

No matter what, I never let my stroke get the best of me. See right after brain surgery, I was determined to write. My mom has a copy of what I wrote (scribble) on her fridge. During my ICU time, I was full of it, and to be honest, I have no idea what I said. Throughout my stay at the rehabilitation hospital, I again was determined to do whatever I possibly could to get better. If the therapists let me, I would do extra sessions.

I learned to walk from the occupational therapist in the hospital, not my physical therapist. Again I was determined to walk because at one point long ago, I was an athlete. To my dismay, rushing worked against me because I learned to walk improperly. It's quite hard to fix a bad habit. When I was at outpatient physical therapy, every step I took (which wasn't all that great anyway) I felt like I was breaking my leg. I stuck with it, and even though I walk funny (it looks like I'm drunk even though I'm 100% sober), I know it could be much worse.

My naps and rest were important, but again, I wanted to get better as soon as possible. I even attempted to use my work phone and work laptop (I asked my husband to bring them to me at the hospital). It ended up making me feel worse because I couldn't really type, and I failed at using Excel. I had moving eyes, so reading wasn't possible which I love to do and to watch TV, forget about it. Seeing the words or images in a non-moving way wasn't achievable. All of this made me more determined than ever to get "better."

After I was released from the hospital, I would go to my sessions for occupational, speech, and physical therapy. The first therapy I "graduated" from was speech. What a joke; I wasn't ready, but the therapist told me something like the insurance company will only pay until you're able to communicate that you're in danger. Talk about frustrating. Here I am trying to get better, and I'm determined to get better, yet I had all these roadblocks. I was then released from occupational therapy though moving my right hand very difficult for me. Physical therapy soon followed.

After my release from "hospital required" therapies, I would do as many studies as possible and as much "independent" therapy as possible. I went to the Neuro Recovery Center known as the NRC at Brooks hospital. There I not only could continue to progress because of their adaptive machines, but I also socialized with amazing people. Through the NRC, I also learned about the Brooks Adaptive Sports and Recreation. I've been kayaking, bowling, and even indoor skydiving with them!

I recently celebrated my third stroke anniversary, and I get goosebumps just thinking about where I was three years ago. I know I am incredibly lucky; however, I have worked incredibly hard. I hope that others will not give up and they will work very hard as well. No matter what the doctors tell you, the sky is the limit. Miracles can happen, it's not because of people not doing anything, it's because people continue along the path of hope.

A stroke is a stroke whether it's ischemic, hemorrhagic, or a TIA. It doesn't matter! We all need to be here for each other. We all need to be supportive of each other. I hope by sharing my story, it will inspire others to continue down the path of self-improvement. I know they say deficits after a year are considered permanent, but that's not necessarily the case. You see, the most improvement is within the first year then it slows in the second year, and then the third year it's smaller, but there are STILL improvements. Even though it's hard to wake up and get out of bed each day, you need to do it (more times than not!). We need to continue to self improve; we need motivation; we need a cheerleader. Let's be that for each other.